Ethics of Expectations

We have all heard of the notion of a self-fulfilling prophecy.  In fact, I used the term in casual conversation earlier today.  But what bearing does it actually have on us as we march toward our goals?  Are we all subjected to such slight of hand? Or does it take certain circumstances to create the possibility?  More than that, is it a form of positive reinforcement or negative? 

We hear all sorts of self-help books claim things like, if you can dream it, you can do it, originating from the iconic Walt Disney.  Many aspects of psychology focus on self-affirmations or speaking your dreams to give them life. Seems to me, if it was that simple, then everyone would be winning at life.  

In Mark Mansons not so subtle book, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F***”, he criticizes greatly the idea of using self-affirmations to create a better life or self-image.  In fact, he states that the very idea of saying something is needed out loud is actually reinforcing the negative awareness that you are lacking it.  Self-affirmations remind you of the things you are not, have not, and cannot do.  Stop them. 

Besides reminding you, even if subconsciously, that you are lacking, self-affirmations reinforce the idea that anyone can do anything, without regard for realistic positions in life, IQ standards, learning disabilities, access to improvement, and also assumes that everyone is aware of the end goal, and that it’s the same for all. 

So how does that carry over into a classroom or work environment?  Clarity, communication, conscious awareness. The ethics behind the self-fulfilling prophecy myth are severely flawed, and while it may haphazardly appear to have worked, it more often than not creates disappointment in oneself and ones peers, family members and supervisors.  As a leader, it is your responsibility to have clear, concise expectations that are the direct result of knowing your business and knowing your people. 

If a supervisor isn’t practicing regular relationship building exercises with ones employees, then it is likely that s/he has blanketed expectations for everyone, regardless of their strengths, weaknesses, or misunderstandings. Gallup recognizes many ways to avoid such traps that hurt both the employee and the business:

-Ensure your employees know what is expected of them at work 

-Make sure they have the tools to do their job

-Talk to them about their progress weekly, monthly, and as needed

-Make sure they are free to build relationships at work to gain others perspectives on the job 

-Always allow them to maintain their voice in company decisions, even if you go in a different direction

-Encourage additional developmental opportunities 

-Supervisors and company missions make employees feel good about the job, and the reason they do it

All of these are at the heart of every business’s success.  Supervisors, teachers alike, need to communicate the value of the their expectations, and find the value in the employees or students.  By simply laying out expectations and not finding out what your group is capable of through these exercises, everyone will be let down eventually simply because we are not all the same.  

There is no ethical dilemma behind the self-fulfilling prophecy if you don’t inflict it on your employees or students. The only ethical dilemma leaders should face in communication of expectation with their staff is in the face of a lack of understanding, or overt rebelliousness. Everyone has the ability to provide value.  As leaders, it is our job to find it in others, not expect the fresh minds of the world to recognize it in themselves.  Give them the tools for discovery, and encourage the scavenger hunt to begin as early as possible.  

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